Breaking my heart..

Today Reagan and I were talking about going to the doctor (she's sick..again.) And she said she knew why she was sick..because I hadn't been giving her her Singulair. Smart kid. She's actually right on the money. But there are reasons I haven't been giving her the Singulair.

I didn't want her suffering from the side effects anymore, and I don't want her being on medication for the rest of her life. I tried to explain that to her, but I think she misunderstands why she needs medication (and who can blame her? She's been on medication her entire life!!) She said, "but Mommy, I need it to live!"

I don't think my heart will ever be fully normal after that statement. So what to do? Josh and I agree we don't want her on medication for the rest of her life unless it's absolutely necessary, but we don't want her sick all the time either. Changes must be made.

I've been lax about not allowing chemicals in the house. That has to stop. Dust catchers, ie knick knacks, have to go. Slip covered furniture....we have but I want to get better slipcovers/furniture so it stays on. Better filtration system, no more candles and axe the perfume again.

I've decided we're going to have to go minimalist. No more photos hanging on the walls, no more tons of bookcases that never get dusted....everything is going to have to go in enclosed shelving unit/bookcases or closed door closets...natural fibers...anything that can collect dust..it needs to go. Which means my prized floral arrangements that I made and absolutely adore..gone. Knick-knacks mostly gone..only keeping a few that can fit in enclosed glassed in cases.

It's going to take a while but her health is worth it.